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Date archive for: November 2013

Movie Review: Prisoners

If you’re looking for a psychological thriller that confirms your suspicions about the mentally handicapped, look no further than Prisoners, a movie that stars the handsome Jake Gyllenhaal and compelling Hugh Jackman. Because I don’t like movie reviews that give away too much, that’s all I can say here. *

I give this movie 12 whistles!
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*Actually I do want to mention that there was a couple next to us during this movie that left an hour before the movie ended, and they left their popcorn and soda in the theater. I honestly think they couldn’t handle the suspense. This movie is not for the weak of mind.

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Movie Review: Side Effects

If you’re looking for a psychological thriller that confirms your suspicions about the mentally depressed, look no further than Side Effects, a movie that stars the haunting Rooney Mara and intriguing Jude Law. Because I don’t like movie reviews that give away too much, that’s all I can say here.

I give this movie 8 pills!
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Play-by-Play

Play by Play of Me Getting Dressed in the Morning:

This young woman hails from the Mid-Atlantic, a region known for its fickle weather and political confusion. She starts with a strong layering decision: a button down and a sweater. But wait, rather than pants, she is putting on…a skirt! Ladies and gentlemen! Skirts have been seen in the recent JCrew catalogue offering, but this one has been resting in her closet for over seven years and is an unprecedented addition to today’s conservative ensemble. She does not cease to amaze. Okay, and now, now for the tights selection…will she go with the standard, respectable black color? Yes. Yes. Predictable. Wait. She is changing her mind. She is going with…GRAY. Gray tights to accent the gray sweater! Inspired approach to colors today: gray tights are just different enough to be noticed and subtle enough to wear in polite company. She has done it again, ladies and gentlemen.

Play by Play of Me Starting Work in the Morning:

This young woman has already overcome incredible odds by just being here, ladies and gentlemen. Oh yes? Yes. Tell us more about that, the fans love a good overcoming-the-obstacles story. Ah yes, well, you see, she did not want to be here this morning, and now, now she is here. Oh. Is that it? She might have a cold. We can’t be sure if it’s a cold or general grogginess. I see. Incredible young woman here.

Okay let’s focus on the action at hand. She has a lunch bag with her, and she is turning on her desktop computer. And now, now she is putting her lunch bag into the fridge and taking out her coffee mug. That is a strategically inspired move; you can tell she’s a seasoned employee. She does not waste time during her computer boot-up process. She fills her mug with water, and puts in the microwave. Now she is sitting down at the desktop, which is just about ready for her to enter in a password. Does she get it right on the first try? Indeed. Indeed she does. Clearly general grogginess does not affect her keyboard dexterity, which I believe we’ll all continue to marvel at as the day continues.

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