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Month: September 2020

A Real Cookie Monster

I just ate 5 giant spoons of Nutella, and I don’t really know why.

Actually I think I know why. A new bakery opened, and I want to go there, but I can’t because of Covid and work. This bakery has consumed all my thoughts. I cannot stop thinking about how much I want cookies from the bakery. My belly, which when I fold the fat can have a full blown conversation with me, wants these cookies.

I need for the following to happen:

1) Baby sleeps in (this is never going to happen).
2) For me to get up early and be front of line for the cookies, to minimize exposure to people.
3) For the cookies to be ABSOLUTELY AWFUL SO I NEVER CRAVE THEM AGAIN. I need them to be straight up cardboard.

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