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Her First Word

Her first word was really “no.” She says “Na na na na” and waves you off to reject whatever you have offered her that she does not care for. She started this around 10-11 months.

Her second word is “duck.” She whispers it once and does not repeat it. We only know this because we have independently experienced this phenomenon at 14 months and one week.

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A Real Cookie Monster

I just ate 5 giant spoons of Nutella, and I don’t really know why.

Actually I think I know why. A new bakery opened, and I want to go there, but I can’t because of Covid and work. This bakery has consumed all my thoughts. I cannot stop thinking about how much I want cookies from the bakery. My belly, which when I fold the fat can have a full blown conversation with me, wants these cookies.

I need for the following to happen:

1) Baby sleeps in (this is never going to happen).
2) For me to get up early and be front of line for the cookies, to minimize exposure to people.
3) For the cookies to be ABSOLUTELY AWFUL SO I NEVER CRAVE THEM AGAIN. I need them to be straight up cardboard.

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Emissions Inspection Letter

My car failed emissions inspection today. I had given the car to my parents because we leased another car when we were expecting. The person doing the inspection asked if I had used the car recently, and I shared it had been pretty much un-driven for the past eight months. He said the scanners could not pick up the information, and I need to drive the car 100-200 miles.
“What? Where am I supposed to go?!” I asked, because it’s Covid time. “I’m not planning to go anywhere,” I said. They shrugged and said I had to drive the car.

My dad knows the father of the person who did the inspection, so when I told him about this, he asked me to bring him a pen and paper, so he could write him a letter. He wrote one line in Farsi with some of the best penmanship I’ve seen from him in a very long time. Then I asked him to read to me what he wrote. He shook his head and said that he could not read it. He put the pen down and said he has Alzheimer’s.

He can still remember things, he just can’t remember letters and words. This is aphasia. So I told him he doesn’t have Alzheimer’s, he just has a problem with words. Then I held back tears so he wouldn’t see me cry, because telling stories and writing emails was something my dad did all the time. I did tell him Alzheimer’s would be worse, because if he didn’t remember us or other people or events, things would be even harder.

I got to see my parents today though, so that was good.

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I have missed most of the milestones. They happen, I get so excited, I promise to make a formal note of them and write about them here. Then time passes, she grows older, new milestones pop up, and I forget what happened when. This is bad! I am a bad mom!
But today we have a milestone! And I’m here!
Here is the milestone:
I heard her say “ma ma.” For about a week she has been saying, “Da da da da da da da,” and I don’t think it’s in reference to David. And I call David “Baba” and myself “Mummy,” so she is not responding to any sort of training. These are noises she has decided to make on her own. When I asked her to repeat “Ma ma,” she smiled coyly and pursed her lips. She is not interested in impressing me, which I love.

Other milestones that have happened that I did not document:
Four to five months – Sitting
Six months – Crawling
Three weeks ago? – Teeth
Between six and eight months – Pulling self up
Nine months – Standing

The pediatrician at her nine month appointment asked us if she is waving good bye to people, and we were like “PEOPLE?! There are no people! No one leaves! Covid!” So I don’t think it’s fair she has not met this milestone. It is not her fault.

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It’s 2:40am. I just emptied the dishwasher and specifically put the cups back in incorrect spots in the cupboard because David didn’t wash my breast pump flange when doing the dishes. Tomorrow/later today we will have this discussion:

David: Hey, thanks for emptying the dishwasher! But this is not where the tea cups go. And the wine glasses go up here. You put two of them next to the tea cups.

Me: mhmm. Hey thanks for doing the dishes last night. Why didn’t you wash my pump?

Then we will stare at each other.

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