Now that I’ve qualified my intellectual merit (re: beret, scarf, glasses, and beard) it’s time I evaluated some art.
This is a compelling piece I did in sixth or seventh grade. I’m not sure what the assignment was, but I know I received an A on it, because that’s how I rolled.
When I uncovered it in the basement alongside other posters I had made for school, I was immediately impressed with the high caliber of my work. I choose this poster to present to you because it is also particularly telling.
Let’s begin with this phrase I cut out, “You can never be too thin, or too powerful.” How insightful of 11-year-old me! It’s clear that even at a young age, I had a clear grasp of reality. In fact, to this day, I have remained anorexic. The only thing I hunger after is power. For example, this site, imawkward, will bring me one step closer to being hugely influential. Right now I have three readers, and one day, I will have five. Then seven, and before I know it, I will have 30 readers – my time will come.
Hmm, there is also a picture of a frazzled older fellow. This must be what I felt like on the inside, when I was 11.
Now let’s see – there are a lot of red cars. One is cross-eyed and grinning. This must be symbolic of my proclivity to look adversity, presented in the form of car troubles, in the face and smile stupidly. On the left it writes, “Grab the spot light at the stop light,” which stresses the importance of being a law-abiding citizen. Bravo, young me. Bravo.