I ordered the wrong type of toilet paper, and I only realized it as I was putting the package onto the shelf. I decided not to return it, because it was shipped to us. What am I supposed to do? Put it back in a cardboard box, take it to the shipping store, and send it back? When you’re returning something, you have to provide an explanation, and the explanation here would have been, “Your triple ply is not up to my husband’s standards for excellence.”
Anyway, David hasn’t noticed yet. This might be the first time our marriage has encountered a test of strength. Here are my two plans when he notices:
Plan A: “What? I didn’t buy that. You must have bought it.”
Plan B: Confess I bought it, and then claim that I have always preferred this toilet paper, and that for the past few years I have been pretending to like the same one he does, because I just want him to love me. But maybe it’s time to love me for me, and not for the person I’ve been trying to be for him.
Plan B is not a bullet proof plan, especially because I don’t really like this toilet paper I accidentally bought as well, so I will likely just dig in for Plan A.